54 Thoughts I Had Watching GBBO - Series 9 Episode 2

While I may have moved darn sarth to start my new job, Bake Off does not wait for anyone. It is an impatient beast, lingering in a floury corner with an occasional yet inevitable soggy bottom.

1. Alas, it is Week 2, a.k.a. 'Cake Week', and while Sandi is adorned with polka dots, Noel is hanging around in a (roundabout) Rococo-era dress à la Marie Antoinette.
2. Duhduhduhduhduh duhduhduhduhduh x8. Duhhh. And we're off! that was the theme tune if you couldn't tell
3. Rahul already knows he's going to run out of time today. That's a good start.
4. The challenge is a traybake, with 16 IDENTICAL slices. Prue & Paul altogether want a unique tasty bake. Mmmm.
5. Antony is going for cardamom and coconut with some Indian sweet stuff. Sounds good to me. Meanwhile, Briony is making a Spanish-inspired bake, while Dan is going for a Black Forest slice.
6. Ooo errrrr Ruby on the station in front is using very similar ingredients to Dan, if not a bit more booze (hello).
   
7. Manon's traybake sounds like it'll be wonderful if she pulls it off: Rosemary and Honey with 'pistachio nougatine'.
8. Terrryyyyyyyy! The beekeeper/home brewer is making some rum & raisin goodies.
9. I think you'll find it's 'Hard Craic' temperature, Briony. The right temperature for those hardcore good times.
10. White chocolate and lemon meringue for Jon - sounds ace.
11. Here's Kim-Joy bringing a leaf called Pandan which apparently smells like Paul's lawn trimmings. Or pond water. Or frogspawn....I'm sold either way.
12. Would like to announce that I would happily wear the shirt Noel's sporting this week.

    

    this is the only pic I could find (sorry Noel)

13. Luke is making a classic lemon & poppy seed combo, with white chocolate on the top.
14. MORE lemons and cardamom for slightly worried Rahul. He's slightly worried because he's making a double-layered traybake (?!)
15. Karen is painting stripes & throwing glitter onto her marzipan. A decision I support 💯%
16. 1 minute remaining!! How did we get here?!
17. Ohhhhhhh um Briony's traybake looks... err... what's the word... Gross. That's it, gross.
    
18. Rahul's traybake is first to be judged. And he's succeeded!! Hooray. Approval all round.
19. Oddly Manon's bake wasn't good at all despite the flavours. The sponge was tough & "bland", argghhh! Paul likes throwing that word around at the moment.
20. Good results for Antony, not so much for Luke but Terry has come back fighting, G'WAN TERRY.
21. Karen's sponge was dry but her bake looked jazzy at least.
22. Wow, Kim-Joy's traybake looks beautiful. Prue was a true fan, Paul not so much because he didn't like the taste of his own lawn. [here is where I run out of editing steam because I'm behind schedule & episode 3 is tomorrow!]
23. I saw a comment somewhere predicting that Briony would be the one that cries a lot & we have our first occurrence here in Episode 2 - despite it looking seriously gross, her bake was delicious. Phew.
24. Jon (aka Sweaty Jon) is back with very lovely looking traybakes. Elegant but not top notch.
25. Ruby did well. Here's Dan... Prue is appreciating the booze & Paul's not saying anything... red flag perhaps? Wait... IT'S A HANDSHAKE!
26. Technical time: le gâteau vert. It has genoise sponge & spinach in it & is linked to Monet somehow... I wonder if Manon has ever made this.
27. Karen and Terry have both forgotten to separate their eggs. I feel like this will have big repercussions on the outcome of their bakes... oh wait Karen is starting again! Good move.
28. He may not know who Monet is but Jon seems genuinely comfortable and calm with this bake.
29. Splitting their cakes into three layers has proved tricky for many & people are starting AGAIN.
30. All of a sudden the pistachios and edible flowers are going on and the cakes are being carried over to the huge table.
31. It's mostly alright at the moment as P&P are going through the various creations... ohhhhhhh Karen has flopped.
32. Rahul is potentially top of the heap for this technical.
33. Yes, Karen has come last here. Third place is Dan, he's doing really well today! Rahul is second... and Jon is first! Oh wow - I forgot to see how he'd done. His calmness & experience truly paid off.
34. Ooof - Terry, Karen and Manon are up for the bottom spot this week, says Paul. Plus Luke & Ruby. Basically half the tent!
35. Showstopper time: a chocolate collar cake, in very hot weather. Easy peasy.
36. Jon is being inspired by his own wardrobe by making a Hawaiian shirt cake. Meanwhile, Antony's cake looks potentially handshake-worthy.
37. Terry is making an Eiffel Tower cake & apparently, he's practised with his central heating a-blaze. Good to know.
38. Paul is trying to do the maths regarding how much time Rahul has to make and assemble his cake. I'm guessing it's a lil' tight.
39. Kim-Joy is making a cake with cats on it (yas), while Manon is crafting a fairytale masterpiece. Over to Briony now who's having a mare trying to make progress on her chocolate fudge & salted caramel tower of greatness.
40. The heat is intense. But not intense enough to stop Karen & Dan getting fruity with their strawberry & raspberry creations respectively.
41. The bakers are biting the bullet to slap on their chocolate collars & wack their bakes in the fridge.
42. Oh NooOoOoOo Terry's Eiffel Tower collapsed!
43. Dan is first up for judging. Wow, he's really smashed it. Surely he must be this week's SB.
44. Despite the cute kitty cake Kim-Joy didn't do too well, and neither did Antony.
45. Now Karen... OH YAY THEY CAN'T FAULT IT! Looks like my lady has saved herself.
46. Jon has smashed it as well. Maybe he's up for the top spot too.
47. Here's Luke with his melted and dishevelled creation. Not a great sponge but the other bits taste good apparently.
48. Manon had little to worry about in the end. She did leave the acetane on though, eesh.
49. Terry :( ohh not good. Briony meanwhile... icky sponges but good flavours.
50. Rahul has flipping done the impossible. He's made it. HE'S GOT A HANDSHAKE, AMENNNNN. This is definitely the result of Paul holding himself back in last week's showstopper.
51. Ruby has THE THIRD HANDSHAKE OF THE DAY yaaaaaaas.
52. It's the judges' discussion time. Paul is ashamed for throwing out his handshakes willy-nilly. AND SO HE SHOULD BE actually I think it's pretty hilarious and exciting although could get rather tiresome at this rate just by episode 4
53. This week's star baker is... Rahul! Wow, I really thought it would be Dan.
54. And leaving us is... Luke! Huh? I thought it would be Terry. Guess it goes to show you CaN nEvEr PrEdIcT tHe FuTuRe.

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