76 Thoughts I Had Watching GBBO - Series 8 Episode 4

It's time. It's here. It's CARAMEL WEEK. I know you've been basically not sleeping waiting for this so I'm here to tell you that you can chill out, it's going to be o k a y. Maybe a little sticky, but okay.

1. This intro is making me smile. Vince Noir's voice is emerging from the depths of Noel.
2. Apparently there's a layered signature this week. I see that as just a way for Bake Off to multiply the amount of difficulty the bakers are going to have.
3. Challenge numero uno: caramel shortbread...s. Y-u-m.
4. While Julia's reluctantly going for a 2-week Star Baker Streak, James is making his millionaire shortbread with pecan nuts.
5. Mmmm. Architom is using stem ginger and almonds, and two types of chocolate for his recipe. I've literally just eaten tea and I'm already hungry. Specifically for caramel shortbread funnily enough.
6. Here's Steven. He's using orange flavouring, macadamia nuts and coffee liquor. So much going on but it sounds delicious nonetheless. 
   
7. HOLD THE PHONE. Not only is Sophie making shortbread with four layers but they're based on jaffa cakes. If she pulls this off, I feel like she might get another P-Dawg handshake.
8. Oh god. Now it's time to melt the sugar and create the caramel. Nothing could go wrong here *gulps so hard my entire neck moves*
9. Yes Staceeeyyyy! She's wacked some rum in hers. Which Paul and Noel are now 'testing' out, for its quality I'm sure. 
   
10. Now for Liam. He's using peanut butter and making his caramel salted. This sounds like a classic.
11. James has just described caramel as like lava. As if I wasn't scared enough to make it already.
12. I'm so nervous. I feel like at least one person is going to burn it.
13. Yeaaaaaah it might be Yan. She's the one baker not bothering with a thermometer. Not quite sure why...
14. Kate's also going for salted caramel, but with walnuts on top. 
    
15. Prue's necklace is very a la Mondrian. I approve. 
    
16. Watching caramel being poured is so satisfying.
17. I wonder if they style the outfits of the bakers before they bake each day. Maybe there's a rule like "noone must outdress Noel or have jazzier necklaces than Prue".
18. Holy carameloli. Architom's caramel has split. At least I think it was his caramel.
19. Steven's (what a surprise) round shortcakes look beautiful.
20. Yan's plan to keep her true identity has been foiled by Noel and his excellent intuition. #YanIsBanksy
21. I should have realised when I saw that giant graffiti-d chicken katsu on the side of the Shard.
22. Break time aaaand we're back. Kate's up for judging first, and P&P approve.
23. Despite James' excellent pouring of caramel, his bake is "a little unpleasant". Ouch.
24. Julia's done well, bar her over-salting of the caramel. 
    
25. Poor Banksy, she's not done so great. Back to the day job.
26. Steven's still look beautiful. Paul says he doesn't like them. I thought he was going to be cheesy and say "I LOVE THEM!" but he was being blunt. Prue liked them though.
27. Victoria Coren/Stacey messed up a bit on a few parts of her bake, and so did Architom.
28. Woah! Liam has done a Tetris layout! With SUPER thick caramel. So super that he got a handshaaaaaake! Yaaaaaaas! 

    

    can I play please

29. Oh, Yan. Nooooo no sad, Yan. You gotta keep it together.
30. Challenge 2: Dutch Treat... what.
31. Oh okay, 12 stroopwafels...! I LOVE these. My go-to snack when I've been to Amsterdam. 
    
32. Now I'm craving these, ohhh laaawd.
33. I still think not telling them the temperature is evil. Makes better telly, but it's still evil.
34. Sandi "likes that [Steven] know[s] about leg waxing"... Cool, okay LET'S MOVE ON
35. Only one practise waffle permitted. Not cool, Prue.
36. Oh my god, IT'S A HISTORY BIT! YEEEEES! We have not been deprived of baked good education. 
    
37. Hahahahhaha. "Nice sticky handshaking, from all the stroop-wafeling?"... ".....yeah"
38. Noel, no. I died inside on that Amsterdam pun.
39. FIVE MINUUUUUUTOS!
40. TIME UP! Julia is a slight nervous wreck.
41. Sophie's caramel is a no-no. Same for James. 

    

    um

42. Yan made them too dry. I knew she wasn't destined for greatness when she was talking about them being "crisp" enough... yeah, stroopwafels are many things but not crisp, Banksy.
43. Everyone is totally diddling on the caramel front.
44. Last place: Julia. Aaaah she did have reason to be nervous.
45. Liam is third... my screen freezed on second... and Stacey came first!
46. I think Liam could be star baker this week if he cracks the Showstopper. 
    
47. Hallo break time.
48. Now we're back and it's relaxed discussion time. Noel and Sandi have serious shirt game this week. 

    

    Y E S

49. The judges are worrying about Architom and James, and Yan too it seems.
50. The showstopper challenge: a cake with all things caramel, including spun caramel on top.
51. James is using honeycomb and praline amongst many other things. Sounds delicious. Apart from the bit where he dips his nuts.
52. Liam is using white chocolate and ginger. Mmmm. Kate on the other hand is going for a sticky toffee apple flavour. Both sound amazing to be honest.
53. Paul seems to be worried about his floury-handed masculinity being in danger, so he's not reacting positively to Architom's Hummingbird idea. 
    
54. While Yan's going for a rainforest, Sophie's opting for a bird's nest. A key word floating around right now is "ambitious".
55. Meanwhile, Julia's using poppy seeds. No lemon but she's halfway there.
56. OH MY GOD. Steven is making a crown shaped cake. This honestly looks like something that would be made in the final.
57. I got distracted by an ice lolly but I'm back now and fully focused.
58. Kate's making her little toffee apples right now, which are cute as heck.
59. Yan is flapping some tool around and splashing green stuff everywhere. Oh, it might be spun sugar.
60. Wonder if I'll ever ice a cake as expertly as that. With a proper spatula tool and everything.
61. Erm, Steven. We know the pouring is 'sexual' but there is no need to embarrass us all. 

    

    
    

62. Funny that, I was thinking "where are the innuendos?". They all seem to have arrived at the moment.
63. I'm impressed by everyone. Mostly because they're all still alive and haven't run away from the stress and sugar. Time for an ad session.
64. And we're back. Paul is having a nice time with Sophie's bake. To the extent that he's just wolfed down an entire egg full of caramel. Where can I get one of those? Like, right now. 

    

    mmmmmmmmmmmmmm

65. Liam's got points for presentation. And for taste. AND for texture. He's done very well, Star Baker status still likely. 

    

    I mean, LOOK AT IT. ARrhhrhhhrlhlhlh

66. Stacey's bake... meh.
    
    Julia is about to faint in relief, as Paul liked the taste of her cake. 
    
67. Yan has pulled her design genius out the bag again, as Banksy often does. Overbaked though.
68. Steven's cake looks like it needs to be in my house right now.
    
    Ah, but it's stodgy. Dangit.
69. Architom's cake looks a bit gross inside (despite the outside which looks like this...:)
    
     Ohhhh no and tastes gross, oh maaan. That was a really bad reaction from the judges, maybe he's going home this week.
70. Kate's definitely not, that's for sure. Paul is a big fan of the apple. 

    

    yum x75698235602 and a bonus yum for the colours

71. Another ad sesh. These are really close together.
72. We hath returneth. Kate is being praised in the little judge meeting. Architom, however, is not. But they do feel sorry for him so that's something.
73. Star Baker... is Kate!
    
    Not Liam, but her cake was THAT good.
74. And leaving us this week is... it's Architom. Awwww. 
    
75. His cake did look shocking though.
76. Woah! Prue says Kate's cake was possibly the best cake she's ever eaten. Ever. Not a bad compliment for a Tuesday.

~Images all via Google Images~